Thanks
Counsellor, Hypnotherapist, Psychotherapist, Sex Therapist
What I understand from your posting is that you ejaculated quickly and didn't have intercourse with this women and you want to know how to improve your sex drive. It might be that you are wanting to improve your satisfaction with your sexual relations.
It can be quite disheartening when we feel like we might have let the other person down, or not lived up to expectation.
You might consider seeing a Sex Therapist, who can be very helpful in helping you to feel more confident in your sexuality, in addition to helping directly with your sexual concerns.
One practical option that might help is taking longer to masturbate, up to 15 minutes, to learn to develop more self control over ejaculation. Think of a mental scale of 1 to 9 and aim to keep your arousal at about 5. You can stop, slow down, change technique, use fantasy, or take deep breathes to help keep it at that level.
When with someone, after ejaculating, there is a recovery period, after which you can get an erection and then continue on with other sexual activity.
However, in the end, it is how you work out how to make the intimacy side of your relationship work with your partner that is most important. It is with them that you will work through all of this to make it satisfying for both of you. If you find then that you are having difficulties, again a Sex Therapist would be your best option, and you can both go speak about how to get things working better.
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